life in a bed

we your mom can't come to you, or make you cookies, you bring a carpet pic nic to your mom. 

my view from bed.  the girls are doing really well with all this.  i pray each night that they are happy and ok and that all their care givers will have the energy to keep up with them. 

the girls come and entertain me most days.  i still get to help them with their homework, all while laying in bed, but the girls are good about following direction.

cece loves climbing up in bed with me. 

my view from the bed, pretty nice right. 

 32 weeks measuring 35wks, i had to bring out the big girl pants.  starting to really feel pregnant and weak.  its so crazy how if you don't walk, your literally can't walk.  i've started to really need help walking and moving around.  once again i have lost all muscle but at least this pregnancy i haven't gain a horrendous amount of weight yet.  baby is measuring 20days ahead, and i feel huge but i can't believe i was even bigger with cece and i have had twins, so i know i still will get bigger.  but my strength sure is gone.  when i go to the dr i have to have help going up and down stairs and getting into the car.  its a really weird feeling not being able to carry your own body weight.

i remember how hard it was to recover after bed rest with the twins, and it scares me a lot.  but at least this time i won't be alone, i'll still be at my parents house recovering from surgery.

we have also gotten great news lately.  i no longer have placenta acretta which is a really scary diagonsis that requires a hysterectomy at delivery and the placenta has moved up which is great.  but i still have a significant tear, they are calling it chronic placenta abruption.  so were still on pins and needles and i still feel like a ticking time bomb, but at least we are 32wks and not 22wks. 

i can't express how blessed i feel.  this baby is a miracle and so many people have pulled around us. 

halloween!

we are a huge halloween family.  we love doing a halloween party and all dressing up for candy.

we were so lucky to have spence come to town, not only for his birthday but for halloween too.  it had been 6wks since i last say him so it was a well deserved visit.

quincy and tenley of course wanted to be princess, cinderella to be exact and cece didn't reallly have a choice.  she got to be a bee like her sisters were at that age.  spence even dressed up as the big bee but i didn't get a picture. 

and of course when the dr comes to town he gets to trim your toe nails.  he did a great job, that might be a little tmi but its good to remember all the things i couldn't do for myself and how much i have to relay on other people. 

mulan and elsa, of course during halloween the girls change outfits several times.

the girls had a halloween program at school and spence was able to to attend and he said they did great!

while spence was in town he tried to do all the classic halloween activities, pumpkin carving, trick or treating, charlie brown great pumpkin and just cheering us all up.  we love and miss spence so much, can't wait til after all this we can finally be together. thats right i'm actually excited to finally  move to santa fe.

30wks and life goes on

fritz and cece have a love hate relationship.  they love to hate each other.  she loves playing with him and he just really wants to take naps. 

30wks and still trekking!  i started bleeding again at 28wks, but nothing too crazy just like a chronic period.  needless to say i bled for 24days straight.  this placenta is very problematic, but somehow baby william has just kept growing and doing really good.  infact he has always measured 14days ahead.  none of the kids ever measure big so he is growing just fine.  the biggest problem with placenta bleeding is that it can stop from feeding the baby efficiently, but so far so good. 

the bishop and stake pres. came to visit me.  it was an honor and a unique privileged to have them come visit.  this situation has been so hard, and being away from spencer has been rough too.  but they came to check on me, offer counsel and to renew my temple recommend.  since i can't physically go to them, they came to me.  i can't tell you how much i love the church and the opportunity i have to grow closer to my Savior through all this. 

the above quote was shared and it is so fitting to our situation. 

face and a hand.  this baby is cute, can't wait to meet him, but he needs to keep cooking as long as he can.  

cece loves books! and likes to point out all the animals!

here knew thing is when i get up to go potty she will rush over and sit in my spot.  i guess that's what happens when you don't call place backs!

aren't these girls gorgeous!  i don't know what we will do with a boy, but i'm sure we can make him fancy too!

q&t friend took them to the schools halloween carnival.  they had the best time ever!  i was feeling bad that i couldn't take them and they would miss out and their sweet friends mom offered to take them.  they had different games and booths to play and even a small spook alley!

both girls won small gold fish, i thought they would last a day or two but they are still going strong after 2wks.  of course they named them shimer and rosetta.

28wks and school pics

it was school picture time.  i really wanted to girls to be super fancy, but since kindergarten is basically recess we decided that might not be a good idea.  

tenley is a great helper with cece, and cece has started to say "tenney" its so cute.

the girls dressed up as minions for drug free week, cause there is a minion reasons to stay drug free!

these girls have big appetites!  and for lunch on some days my dad will let them come eat lunch with me.  notice cece is eating a whole corn dog by herself!  she's a great dipper too!

cece entertaining me in bed.  she is a great bed partner and climbs up on the bed and walks to her special spot right next to me each morning.  pappy has taught her to say, 'good morning' she is a cutie and loves signing time.  she is so smart.  one day i said cece you are so cute, and she said, smart! and did the sign language, super cute and she is right she is super smart.  when she starts to whine, my dad signs stop whining and she says, in the sweetest voice, 'ok'

28wks and i got to get out of bed and watch conference with the family! so relieved to make to 28wks, its a huge milestone.  especially because the dr said it would be a miracle to make it that far, and i agree it rally has been a miracle. 

my sweet friends from high school +hillary (she had to leave early) came and visited me one night. it was a great distraction and we laughed really hard.  love these girls.

here are the official school pictures.  can i just tell you how hard it is to do fancy hair while laying flat in bed!  especially without any hair spray.  so i take fault for their crazy hair, but they sure are cute girls.  i don't know how we got so lucky!

hospital stay and a party in bed. 24wks

my first heavy bleed was at 19wks, i had another huge bleed at 20wks and then 2 more significant bleeds at 23wks.  This time the bleeding didn't stop and i was having contractions so we headed to the hospital again.  dr. glenn and the nurses we awesome.  they through every possible med at me to stop the contractions.  magnesium solfate through and iv was horrible. the nurses told me i would feel hot, nausea, my muscles would hurt and a head ache. and they were right, i felt like my body had been lit on fire and i was laying on a hot coal bed.  i had them give me ice packs to put all over my body.  that drug is rough but it helped stop the contractions and a day later the bleeding stopped as well.  because of the problematic placenta they wanted to keep monitoring me for awhile see what would happen.  needless to say i was in the hospital 10days.  it was hard being away from the kids, and i was pretty lonely, but great friends sent  packages and books and pudding to keep me busy.

i was so worried i didn't want to deliver at 24wks i did receive steriods to help the baby's lungs and the nurses were very nice.  At one point i started bleeding again this was day 6 in the hospital, i was alone and my nurse denise came in and just gave me a hug and told me i'd be ok.  that this is hard, but i and the baby were going to be just fine. 

one night when i was having a horrible bowel episode the song 'sons of helaman' came to my mind.  baby william is already such a strong and amazing boy. 

i finally was released to go home and cece enjoyed playing with my empty suit case. 

these girls love to dance!

have i mentioned how great my dad is, he takes them to dance every wednesday and enjoys seeing them dance their hearts out.  tenley has finally mastered her cart wheel too!

this little lady love her pappy and her manna.  she likes to be held and cuddled and i'm so grateful that my family can give the kids all the things i can't.  it breaks my heart that i will miss out onf 5months of cece little life, people say she won't even remember, which is right but i will. 

life in bed is not very exciting, it is really hard to lay around all day, especially when you hear kids need help or cry.  or when you really just want to stretch your legs or make yourself pretty.  but its a sacrifice that is well worth it!

i've got great helpers.  jojo shaved my legs and i have never felt so pampered in my life!

cece and pappy make great food and she helps bring me food and takes my water bottle into the kitchen to get it refilled.  she also knows i have crackers and likes to sit in bed with me eating crackers.  the crumbs in the bed are hilarious but i just can't say no to her. 

the girls have been great helpers and my little nurses, putting lotion on and even my socks.  they are so sweet.  and when i get up to go potty they even help me walk over to the bathroom and get back in bed.  they have such sweet caring hearts, but i can't imagine how hard all this is on them.